marriage

They say, “Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get.” This particularly rings true out in relationship and dating world. Someone may look like the perfect package, everything you are looking for but then you unwrap the exterior, have a taste and they are glazed cherry or orange cream! (Yuk!)

How many times is it ok to try again or take another bite? We are all guilty of it, hell, I sure am but sometimes despite all the advice from those around you, telling you not to you just have to give it one more go and see for yourself. To be honest, there’s nothing wrong with that. For instance, I used to hate broccoli as a kid and after much negotiation every night with my parents, we used to make a deal that I could leave the dinner table if I at least are the florets. I used to put it all in my mouth, pretend to eat it, take my plate to the bin to ‘clean it’ and spit out my broccoli. Now I absolutely love it. Eat it on anything and love it cooked, raw or however else it comes! Ok, I digress but what I’m trying to say is our tastes change. Unfortunately though, when it comes to people, a majority of the time the ones who leave a foul and bitter taste in your mouth after the first time, always will.

It’s up to us to learn from mistakes. Apparently, that’s what separates us from the animals. You will always find those who think there are exceptions though. Some go back and try to continue creating a normal life for themselves with that person, everyday being a constant struggle but with the hope that one day that person will change. Hopes that they will grow up, care for you and love you as much as they do themselves or become a good parent. While others are not even that far along and keep being promised the world a million times over only to be let down and neglected each and every time.

It’s hard to watch when you see it happen to those you love time and time again. All you can do is offer a little insight and more importantly your support and hope that they will eventually see the situation for what it is. We can only hope they come to terms with believing that they deserve better. Life is too short to be miserable from some disrespect-able arsehole or to settle for what you have. No one should ever settle for less than they deserve. We are all entitled to the very best for ourselves. If we can’t enjoy our life, then what really is the purpose?!

Personally, I’ve been through it all myself. A lot of us have. You’re in a great relationship with someone in the beginning, then people or certain things change for the worst. You know, all the usual stuff, whether they cheat, lie, turn to some religious colt and try brainwashing you or all of the above. The relationship then ends or you go on a ‘break’ whether it’s your choice or theirs and then into the depressing spiral of being back out there in the single world. It can be lonely out there at first and sometimes the only person you think you can talk to is your ex. All of a sudden you’re back together for whatever reason and we repeat everything all over again. We’ve all done it but some of us need to move to the next chapter.

“Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me”

Get out there, find someone new. Let life happen. We all deserve the best of everything. You will find your ‘one’ when you least expect it. Trust me, I know. I found my true love on the other side of the world. I moved from Australia to Canada without even giving it too much of a thought (sorry mum and dad). How do you know what true love is and how do you know you found it you might ask? Trust me, you don’t have to ask. You just know!

*Nic Sharkey is by no means a psychologist, expert or guru but he is on to something here.